Humor Posts

• 04.21.09 The Assassination of J.G. Ballard Considered As A Metafictional Homage (Ideas, Humor)

  “Some people have suggested that mental illness is a kind of adaptation to the sort of circumstances that will arise in the future. As we move towards a more and more psychotic landscape, the psychotic traits are signs of a kind of Darwinian adaptation.”—1998

  Abstract.

  Numerous studies have been conducted upon patients in terminal paresis (GPI), placing the author J.G. Ballard in a series of simulated auto crashes, e.g. multiple pileups, head-on collisions, motorcade attacks (fantasies of Presidential assassinations remained a continuing preoccupation, subjects showing a marked polymorphic fixation on windshields and rear trunk assemblies). Powerful erotic fantasies of an anal-sadistic surrounded the image of the award-winning novelist.… MORE

• 02.25.09 Adding Value = Theft! (Ideas, Humor)

  Roy Blount, president of the Authors’ Guild, writing in the New York Times, attempts to defend his groups screwball assertion that the Amazon Kindle 2’s text-to-speech capability is cheating authors out of audio-book royalties:

  What the guild is asserting is that authors have a right to a fair share of the value that audio adds to Kindle 2’s version of books.

  And that assertion makes no sense. The creator of an item does not have a right to impose an arbitrary tax on anyone who adds value to the item. Otherwise we’d be open to all sorts of nonsensical scenarios, like… MORE

• 07.14.08 The Ramones Sing iPhone Development (Me, Humor, Computers)

  (This is more or less to the tune of Rock’n’Roll High School, or any other Ramones song for that matter. You have to imagine Joey Ramone singing it. Johnny, you just switch between C and F every couple of lines, got it?)

  Well back in March I got my feelins hurt
  When Apple wouldn’t gimme no developer cert
  The SDK they gave me had a “simulator”—Fooled around with it, then said “see you lator!”

  (iPhone, iPhone, iPhone developer)… MORE

• 05.11.08 Stickies makes its music-video debut! (Me, Humor, Computers)

  Stickies and I hadn’t spoken in a while, but this morning I just heard it’s made its acting debut in a music video! That was unexpected, to say the least, but it’s an exciting career move, and I had to congratulate it; it does a great job.… MORE

• 03.27.08 “Sci-Fi Mavens Offer Far Out Homeland Security Advice!” (Ideas, Humor)

  Speaking of Arthur C. Clarke, another of his achievements was to live a long life without making a complete ass of himself. A goal we should all emulate, but one that’s eluded too many other SF writers.

  For example! Take Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle, who, having ceased putting any mental effort into their writing at least 25 years ago, now have the free time, in their dotage, to advise top government officials on … MORE

• 03.14.08 iPhone Developer Rejections Top 10,000 (Humor, Computers)

  CUPERTINO, California—March 14, 2008—Apple® today announced that more than 10,000 iPhone™ developers have received enigmatically-worded rejection letters for the beta iPhone Developer Program. The iPhone Developer Program provides developers with a complete and integrated process for developing, debugging, and distributing applications for iPhone and iPod touch, complete with real-world testing on iPhone.

  “Developer reaction to our email has been incredible with more than 1,000 snarky posts and irate comments on high-profile Mac websites,” said Philip Schiller, … MORE

• 03.06.08 Apple slashdots itself (Humor, Computers)

  This is what happens when Steve Jobs announces that an iPhone SDK will be available for download within the hour:
  … MORE

• 02.26.08 Over 2^32 Sold! (Nearly) (Humor, Music, Computers)

  CUPERTINO, California—February 26, 2008—Apple® today announced that iTunes® (www.itunes.com) is now the number two music retailer in the US, behind only Wal-Mart, based on the latest data from the NPD Group*. Apple also announced that there are now over 50 million iTunes Store customers. iTunes has sold over four billion songs, …

  I really hope they thought ahead and used a 64-bit int for the number_of_songs_sold variable, otherwise some Bad Stuff might happen in the … MORE

• 01.24.08 FakeSteved! (Me, Humor)

  I used to think it was the Big Time if I got a link from Daring Fireball, but now someone just pointed out to me that the Fake Steve Jobs has taken note of my post.

  So … what does it mean for my post to be criticized by a fictional construct that embodies a parody of the CEO of the very same ex-employer my post criticizes? Especially when, more specifically, that fictional construct’s humor is … MORE

• 11.01.07 Review: ZackAndWiki (Social Software, Games, Humor)

  It’s a sure sign that wikis are going mainstream when one appears for a video-game console. “ZackAndWiki” has the requisite goofy name (like TikiWiki or WikkaWiki), but once you try it out, you’ll find it approaches its job very differently than you’re probably expecting.
  … MORE